not for everyone

Can I step on my soap box for a minute?

There is one thing that bothers me about [some of] the adoption community…

Although I am pro-adoption and am passionate about it, I don’t believe its for everyone and its certainly not the solution to the orphan crisis. I don’t agree with the statement that “if [this number of] Christians adopted, there would be no orphans in the world.” There may be no orphans, but there would be a lot of unhappy children and families out there. You have to be called. Committed. Wholeheartedly. Because it brings unique challenges and joys. I’m not saying that those that do it are holier-than-thou or called to a higher calling. Not at all. We are not “doing a noble thing” by adopting. I’m just trying to say that, like anything, its not for everyone. What is right for one family, is not necessarily the same for another. God grows each family as HE sees fit. Nor should one put that expectation on another, like “why don’t they just adopt?”

James 1:27 is often misinterpreted too. We are not all called to adopt the orphans, but we are ALL called to CARE for them. There are many ways to do this. Adoption is only one of them. I think this blogger says it so well and does a better job expressing what I’m poorly attempting to. I’m probably coming across a lot stronger than I intended to as well. Oops! :)

Okay, I’m stepping down now. :)


the other part

Since the very beginning, I am conscious to not romanticize our adoption journey and my hopes and dreams. I want to keep a level head and heart, and realistic expectations. Adoption is not full of sugar plums and dancing unicorns. Its not a fairy tale…

…Like, its so easy to just see the joy in adoption. What a gift, a blessing, this child is (and rightfully so). And how they are orphaned no more… a family is born!!!

A beautiful story of redeeming love and second chances.

But that is only part of the story. The circumstances surrounding the adoption is anything but happy. It is downright ugly and painful. With every joy in children coming home into their new families, there is a tremendous loss that preceded this new union. Perhaps the death of a parent, or the unimaginably difficult decision of relinquishment by the parent. I’ve thought about this a lot since we began seriously considering adoption. I am fully aware that our joyous gain, in some sense, will be their painful loss. And I just can’t wrap my heart around this. I already grieve this for them.

Today I stumbled upon this post. It explains my sentiments so well.

and so it begins!!

The time has come! Its finally here! I can’t believe it! Can someone pinch me? :)

We applied to Holt’s Uganda program last week, October 10th to be exact!! And this week we got the mountain of paperwork sent to us… let the paper chase begin!! :)

Here we go…


Tim and I have both recently met co-workers from Africa! What are the chances that the (possibly only) Beninwa man living in Portland works at the same department as Tim? Tim’s co-worker was so excited to hear that Tim had been to his country of Benin, actually had heard of the country, and understood that ‘he didn’t live under a bush in Africa’ (so sad some people’s perception of Africa!). They spoke a little French and talked of Benin. And then, in true African fashion and hospitality, he immediately wanted to introduce Tim to his boss (who is also Tim’s boss) :)

At work, I recently met a nurse from Ghana when I spoke with him regarding his request for an IV placement in one of his patients. At this particular hospital, we have many African American employees, but as soon as I heard him speak, I knew he was not African-American. He was from Africa. I asked where he was from. Ghana. I have been to his country! His whole face lit up and he gave me an enthusiastic handshake and hug. :) I shared some places we visited. So now, in true African community, he greets me by name every time I see him. :) And I say “Akwaaba.” :)

We are both so blessed to have even those small connections in our lives at work.

God is so good.